Idol Wednesday
Welcome to Day Two of my American Idol fanaticism. Hello, I love pop culture.
Seacrest opens by wondering if the girls can match the guys’ throw-down last night. It was more of a toss-down, so I’m betting they’ll manage.
Gina’s “Alone”, and never really cared until she met us. She brings her big rock voice, but sounds screamy at times. R says she got it together. P says, man, excellent job. S says the vocals felt forced and, hey, isn’t she supposed to be edgier? In an embarrassing moment that probably shouldn’t be happening, Seacrest admonishes her boyfriend to propose. I don’t even think she told him to say that! I say: the girl’s got spirit.
Alaina is not ready to make nice. She hits a few bad notes and doesn’t quite pull off the bold, angry thing like a true Chick, but maybe that’s better for her – I fear a lot of voters are going to HATE the fact that she’s singing this song. R says it was not good. P says it was a hard song to sing. S says he’ll put it into plain English: this performance was like R taking part in a 100-meter sprint. P says she looks beautiful, which in P-speak means she sucks. I say: I’m ready to let her go.
LaKisha sings “Midnight Train to Georgia." She’s flawless; I’ve got nothin’. R says she’s got some vibe. P says she loves it, and her. S says she’s a phenomenally good singer, but she should act like more of a star. (Um, don’t go advising normal people to become insufferable divas right before they make it big. 'Kay? Thanks.) Then he criticizes her outfit, which is uncalled for. I say: major contender.
Melinda, who is by far the most likable candidate, personality-wise, ever to appear on this show, sings “Funny Valentine”. At first, I think she’s headed for disaster (AI history: slow and old can be baaad), but she does the best version I’ve EVER heard. R says we’ve got a competition going. P is astounded. S says it was incredible and that she’s a breath of fresh air. I say: perfect.
Antonella sings a Celine song, which nobody should ever attempt. (Say what you want about Celine – that woman can sing.) She hits, like, three notes, total. R says she’s drop-dead gorgeous…but pitchy. P says less than 1 % of the population can sing like Celine. S says it was worse than last week. Antonella fights back, comparing herself to Jennifer Hudson, whom S also dissed back in the day. I say: just go home.
Jordin, who is by far the most impressive human being, everything-wise, ever to appear on this show, sings a song from Mulan. She’s incredibly articulate, insanely talented, and, oh, seventeen. She’s confident and gorgeous and charismatic. I may be slightly in love with her. R says it wasn’t her best, but is so, so impressed with where she is at this point in her life. P tells her she’s a brilliant talent. S stresses her massive potential. I say: top three.
Stephanie sings “Dangerously in Love” just like Beyonce. Which is great, except that it makes her – just like Beyonce. R says she has proven she deserves to be up here, but needs to find her own sound. P says fantastic, brilliant, more adjectives, and everyone will be in love with her. S agrees with P. Let’s say it again. He AGREES that it was terrific. I say: another one to watch.
Leslie is feelin’ good. She’s got that smoky, deep, soulful thing going on. I’m a BIG fan of the voice, but she’s too jazzy-cool for the voters, probably. I’m thinking basement club, gritty city. R likes that she’s returned to her trademark style, but it was just aiight. P says she’s in her element. S says a bunch of whack shit that we’ll skip over, because P jumps in to compare her to a “different” flavor of ice cream. The judges spiritedly discuss what flavor of ice cream Leslie is, while she kind of rides the wave. I say: keep this one around.
Haley’s got the stuff that we want, the stuff that we need. Girl has WAY more fun than she did last week and is entertaining to watch. Still, I sense reviews will not go well, because you just can’t sing “The Queen of the Night” and get away with it. R says everyone has had a good time, but the song was not great for him. P says leaps and bounds better than last week. S says she gave it a go, but advises that contestants not take on Whitney songs unless they have Whitney voices. I say: yeah, forgettable.
Sabrina sings “He Fills Me Up”, another Whitney song. She’s powerful, and actually does have the voice for it, but – meh. Except for her hair, which is itself incredibly charismatic, she just doesn’t command attention. R says nice overall. P says she’s a big contender. S says she almost confused power with shouting, but predicts she’ll be back next week. I say: works for me, I guess.
And we’re done. I’ll spare you commentary on the eliminations tomorrow, as I’ll be watching Grey’s Anatomy and, you know, reading some tremendously important literary masterpiece during the commercial breaks. Because I’m cultured, oh yes I am.
Seacrest opens by wondering if the girls can match the guys’ throw-down last night. It was more of a toss-down, so I’m betting they’ll manage.
Gina’s “Alone”, and never really cared until she met us. She brings her big rock voice, but sounds screamy at times. R says she got it together. P says, man, excellent job. S says the vocals felt forced and, hey, isn’t she supposed to be edgier? In an embarrassing moment that probably shouldn’t be happening, Seacrest admonishes her boyfriend to propose. I don’t even think she told him to say that! I say: the girl’s got spirit.
Alaina is not ready to make nice. She hits a few bad notes and doesn’t quite pull off the bold, angry thing like a true Chick, but maybe that’s better for her – I fear a lot of voters are going to HATE the fact that she’s singing this song. R says it was not good. P says it was a hard song to sing. S says he’ll put it into plain English: this performance was like R taking part in a 100-meter sprint. P says she looks beautiful, which in P-speak means she sucks. I say: I’m ready to let her go.
LaKisha sings “Midnight Train to Georgia." She’s flawless; I’ve got nothin’. R says she’s got some vibe. P says she loves it, and her. S says she’s a phenomenally good singer, but she should act like more of a star. (Um, don’t go advising normal people to become insufferable divas right before they make it big. 'Kay? Thanks.) Then he criticizes her outfit, which is uncalled for. I say: major contender.
Melinda, who is by far the most likable candidate, personality-wise, ever to appear on this show, sings “Funny Valentine”. At first, I think she’s headed for disaster (AI history: slow and old can be baaad), but she does the best version I’ve EVER heard. R says we’ve got a competition going. P is astounded. S says it was incredible and that she’s a breath of fresh air. I say: perfect.
Antonella sings a Celine song, which nobody should ever attempt. (Say what you want about Celine – that woman can sing.) She hits, like, three notes, total. R says she’s drop-dead gorgeous…but pitchy. P says less than 1 % of the population can sing like Celine. S says it was worse than last week. Antonella fights back, comparing herself to Jennifer Hudson, whom S also dissed back in the day. I say: just go home.
Jordin, who is by far the most impressive human being, everything-wise, ever to appear on this show, sings a song from Mulan. She’s incredibly articulate, insanely talented, and, oh, seventeen. She’s confident and gorgeous and charismatic. I may be slightly in love with her. R says it wasn’t her best, but is so, so impressed with where she is at this point in her life. P tells her she’s a brilliant talent. S stresses her massive potential. I say: top three.
Stephanie sings “Dangerously in Love” just like Beyonce. Which is great, except that it makes her – just like Beyonce. R says she has proven she deserves to be up here, but needs to find her own sound. P says fantastic, brilliant, more adjectives, and everyone will be in love with her. S agrees with P. Let’s say it again. He AGREES that it was terrific. I say: another one to watch.
Leslie is feelin’ good. She’s got that smoky, deep, soulful thing going on. I’m a BIG fan of the voice, but she’s too jazzy-cool for the voters, probably. I’m thinking basement club, gritty city. R likes that she’s returned to her trademark style, but it was just aiight. P says she’s in her element. S says a bunch of whack shit that we’ll skip over, because P jumps in to compare her to a “different” flavor of ice cream. The judges spiritedly discuss what flavor of ice cream Leslie is, while she kind of rides the wave. I say: keep this one around.
Haley’s got the stuff that we want, the stuff that we need. Girl has WAY more fun than she did last week and is entertaining to watch. Still, I sense reviews will not go well, because you just can’t sing “The Queen of the Night” and get away with it. R says everyone has had a good time, but the song was not great for him. P says leaps and bounds better than last week. S says she gave it a go, but advises that contestants not take on Whitney songs unless they have Whitney voices. I say: yeah, forgettable.
Sabrina sings “He Fills Me Up”, another Whitney song. She’s powerful, and actually does have the voice for it, but – meh. Except for her hair, which is itself incredibly charismatic, she just doesn’t command attention. R says nice overall. P says she’s a big contender. S says she almost confused power with shouting, but predicts she’ll be back next week. I say: works for me, I guess.
And we’re done. I’ll spare you commentary on the eliminations tomorrow, as I’ll be watching Grey’s Anatomy and, you know, reading some tremendously important literary masterpiece during the commercial breaks. Because I’m cultured, oh yes I am.
posted by Tracy at 10:26 PM
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